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• THE JOURNEY IS OVER (JOURNAL 90)

  3 June, 2016

  If you were to read our journal entry for this day last year, you would read the following Today's instalment… [more]

• JOURNAL 89

  22 May, 2016

  Hi sweetheart, Sometimes I experience periods of “What if…?”. These are times when my mind seems… [more]

• JOURNAL 88

  17 May, 2016

  Hi Darling, Coming home from the hospital with a mechanical device fitted to my chest – a P.E.G. I think it… [more]

• JOURNAL 87

  13 May, 2016

  JOURNAL 87 The doctor said I can go home this morning. The surgery has had the desired effect and this new means of… [more]

• JOURNAL 86

  10 May, 2016

  JOURNAL 86 MOTHER’S DAY Hello sweetheart, I haven’t spoken to our children as to… [more]

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• Journal (1)

  27 April, 2015

   

  It is now coming up to 2 weeks since we had that private Cremation Service – the final farewell to my wife of 50 years. As the curtains closed over the casket I heard my voice saying, “Goodbye, my love. I love you”. The next awareness I had was standing at the front of the chapel surrounded by family and friends.

  You see, I have spent the last few months solely focussed on the care of my wife and knowing that one day soon I would be in the same room as the casket containing her body.  (Pinch yourself Mike)  I felt greatly threatened and intimidated by that prospect. And how would I cope with the prospect of the funeral? My wife’s funeral?

  Now I am standing on the other side of those awesome events. Did they really happen? Is she really dead? How did I manage to get through the funeral? Or am I going to wake up in a moment and discover that none of this has happened or is still to happen?

  The reality of these things is now starting to be felt. Yes, they have happened.

  Jut today another taste of reality demanded recognition. The journey is not over!  At least, my part of the journey is not over. It occurred to me today that this is a time to regroup and then to resume the journey.

  An obvious question is, “Why couldn’t Bev be joining me for the next part of the journey?”  The answer is equally obvious, “I don’t know!”  My sense is that I couldn’t have made it thus far without her presence, support, wisdom and love.  How will I make it if she is not there to provide those beautiful qualities for the rest of the journey?

  So many questions still remain.