-+*Journal 34
1 September, 2015
Well, my love, another Sunday….another week…comes to a close. After our Annual General Meeting this afternoon, I am now officially an Elder at our Church. How about that? I hope I can contribute to the spiritual life of the Church and that Pastor Tony in particular will find whatever contribution I make assists him in the leadership of our Church.
Something else happened today that caught me off guard. The new Church Directory was distributed to our folk. Like most people (I suspect) I turned to “Robinson" to check if our details are correct. They are. Phone numbers are correct. Address correct. Then I saw it.
Next to your name were two words, (“with Jesus"). I just sat and stared at them.
I think that was the first time I have seen a written and “official" recognition of your death in any Church correspondence. Initially, it felt like a cold, hard fact. But the more I thought about it, the more it occurred to me that there was something warm - even beautiful - in that recognition.
Today I have been going through a lot of photos looking for a few in particular. It turned into a trip down memory lane. I don't think that my dad owned a camera. I can't remember him ever taking a photo. The lack of family photos would support that observation.
I certainly have made up for that photographic wilderness!! You and I have accumulated boxes and boxes of photographic slides and, now, with the impact of digital photography, this has exploded. I was stunned to realise that I have over 2,000 photos on my I Pad alone.
Anyway, so many memories were stirred and, in a very positive way. Such an exercise could produce a sense of loss and deprivation. For me, I found myself thankful for all the many experiences we have had together and with our children. So many friends have populated our 50 years together. These are people who have added colour and flavour to our lives.
Darling, I tell you all that to say this: one of the lessons that I am learning is that our journey has involved a lot of deliberate choices to do with our attitude. Our attitude to our circumstances. More particularly our attitude to our God. You have made choices to adopt a positive approach - especially towards God who allowed MND to render your body incapacitated. That is why you have been such an inspiration to so many and no one more than me.
I thank you for the choices you made in this regard. My perspective took a major shift forward today - positively - as all those memories made an undeniable case for me to say “Thank you, Lord" for aspects of our more recent experiences about which I have been confused.
I am still unsure about aspects of our last 12 months together but that confusion is now being permeated by gratitude for what we have had and that is happening because I am choosing to…..well, you know that sermon title, “How's Your Attitude?". That question ambushed me today and I'm grateful.
Well, my journey continues until God calls me home
But Until Then…….
You remain the love of my life
Mike