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• JOURNAL 80

  29 March, 2016

  Our Journey Through The Valley The regular readers of Barnabas will probably sense that we are coming up to… [more]

• JOURNAL 79

  22 March, 2016

  JOURNAL 79 My Darling, As we draw closer to the first anniversary of your death and departure from among us, I find… [more]

• JOURNAL 78

  14 March, 2016

  One year ago on a day just like today there was no way we could know that we had just a few weeks left together.… [more]

• JOURNAL 77

  8 March, 2016

  Hello Sweetheart, I was looking for a definition of ‘epiphany’ earlier today because of something that… [more]

• JOURNAL 76

  3 March, 2016

  My darling I can hardly believe how quickly this first year of your absence has gone. We have begun making plans that… [more]

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• JOURNAL 79

  22 March, 2016

  JOURNAL  79

  My Darling,

  As we draw closer to the first anniversary of your death and departure from among us, I find that I’m thinking a lot about our journal entries. We look back at events very differently to how we anticipate them.

  Reading from our journal from those days immediately prior to the “main event” awakens within me a whole range of memories and emotions. The following extracts tell something of what we were feelings in those final days.

  It’s been a while since our last “instalment” from our journal but that is not to suggest that nothing is happening. As was inevitable, this wretched disease continues to spread and weave its influence.

  A number of medical tests over the last few weeks have revealed that Bev’s lung capacity has diminished to the point where she will not be able to have a surgical procedure that would see the insertion of what is known as a P.E.G. which is a device that conveys nourishment to the body when swallowing is no longer possible.

  The next and only option is for Bev to come under palliative care for whatever time remains.

   Yet we continue to be upheld by the prayers, notes, cards and visits (although visits are having to become limited in terms of frequency and duration.

  Gene Edwards in his powerful little book, “The Prisoner in the Third Cell” puts the challenge this way:

  “Your Lord has put something in your life which you cannot bear. The burden is simply too great. He was never supposed to do THIS! But the question remains. Will you continue to follow this God who did not live up to your expectations?”

  Yes.