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Next month marks the 46th anniversary of our wedding. That was the occasion when Bev and I made certain vows or promises to each other. In retrospect, those promises had not been well considered at the time of their uttering - especially the one about death parting us! That's not to suggest that either of us deliberately lied to the other. Rather it simply acknowledges that a young couple standing on the threshold of a life together are not really thinking or talking about the end of their shared life.
" 'til death us do part". I recall at my daughter's wedding her husband sang to her a lovely song of commitment. I don't think "there was a dry eye in the house". As the officiating minister, I thought I was handling it rather well. Until, that is, he got to the part where the lyrics acknowledged that there would come a time when one would have to lay the other down into the arms of Jesus. That was the end of my steady emotional response!
"'til death us do part". Forty six years is a long time to have together. We are now entering that season of life where it's no longer wedding bells "that are breaking up that old gang of mine" but funeral bells. We are rarely buying wedding cards but increasingly we are buying sympathy cards.
"'til death us do part". So why am I thinking this way? Has the doctor delivered bad news recently? No. Have I had a premonition about impending death? No. Could it be the conversation we had recently with one of our neighbours about her family situation involving the terminal condition of her daughter-in-law? Every day we are all confronted with the reality of death.
"'til death us do part". The time when one of us - Bev or I - will lay the other down in the arms of Jesus is (obviously) closer now. Without becoming morbid about the whole scenario, I sometimes look at my wife of 46 years and, in the quiet reflection of that moment, I wonder how I would cope should it be me that lays her down in Jesus' arms. How would she cope if it was her who laid me down?
I have conducted many, many funerals over the 40 years I have been a Pastor. I have visited terminally ill patients, dear people who knew that "their time" was near. I have sought to console the grieving friends and relatives of the recently departed. I have read to them the reassuring words of Jesus Christ about heaven and the reality of life after death. But all this has, for the most part, been for them. I have been there with them in their hour of need.
But what of my own experience? What do I really believe about death and life after death? Have I really embraced the Biblical perspective and teaching for myself? And my visit to see the doctor this morning, what if the test results had revealed the presence of some life-threatening condition that was untreatable or inoperable?
There are people all across our world today who will receive such news. Why not me? Such questions are alerting me to my need to explore again what I really believe in these areas of faith and trust. How can I affirm to others what may remain to be tested and affirmed within myself?
